One of my former bosses told me that she always knows who has had restaurant experience when she goes out with a group of people based on how much they tip. She said that people who've never worked in the food service industry generally give tips of up to 15%, but people who have worked tables give closer to 20%. I am fortunate enough to have been able to go through life thus far without waitressing (I guarantee that I would be awful*), but I tip 20% unless service was utterly abysmal (i.e. - the staff was actually rude to me). My ex-boss said I am an exception.
I find that in NYC, most people are calculate tips in one of two ways: they double the tax (which is 8.75%) or they give 20% of the subtotal. Either way seems right to me. The minimum wage in the restaurant industry in NYS is $4.60. In theory, if staff do not earn enough tips to average them out to $7.15 an hour, the restaurant must cough up the extra dough. But how likely is that? Not very.
I rant about this now because I have gone out with some people a few times who consistently refuse to acknowledge that they have to pay tax and tip. It is so bad that I've actually pulled out a calculator to show how their $15 entree is really over $19 when you add tax ($1.31) and tip ($3), so putting in $20 is fair. Even after this, people have argued with me that they overpaid.
Not everyone is good at math. I understand that. I'm no math genius myself. But when I fucking run through the numbers and explain them, and my co-diner still doesn't want to pay his fair share, I am going to be very angry. Because I'm not going to short restaurant staff because my companion is too fucking cheap to pay what he owes, I get stuck paying for it. And it adds up over time. Eventually I just focus on how the person is going to screw me or someone at the end of the meal, and I don't enjoy myself. It makes me not inclined to dine out with certain individuals any more.
*Maurice, the hamster who runs on the wheel that powers my brain, would never be able to keep up with all the orders and I'd always forget to bring people drinks or who ordered what and all that.
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I had a co-worker who would always say for his $9.50 lunch "Here's $10 - that should cover it." Um, NO.
ReplyDeleteThen the other co-worker who would order the lunch, PLUS an extra salad and appetizer and maybe soup too, and then want to split the bill with all the people who had ordered just the $9.50 lunch, when hers was like $20 in reality.
I have never forgotten the blogger who stiffed you in Chicago a few years back...she is blocked from me every way she can be blocked. Part of me feels it is stupid to hold a grudge, but the other part of me is like "Hey, if you lie about putting money in for lunch, I want NOTHING to do with you."
i've never worked in food service (besides dining service & making the food in college) & i have great respect. i usually only give 15% for crappy/below par service and at least 20 for good, if not more for excellent service. and that is one of the many reasons i love s because he's never really worked in a restaurant either and that is exactly how he tips too.
ReplyDeleteI am pretty good at math, and I always just figure out 20% (I mean, unless service was really awful). But Sweetie, who is not good at math, for some reason always thinks I'm stiffing the waitperson and rounds up. So on a $50 bill, I suggest a $10 tip and Sweetie leaves $12.
ReplyDeleteAnd this is why I am always happy and honored to dine with all of you. I pretty much just figure out 20%, too.
ReplyDeleteI did wait tables. I can't stand people that don't tip close to or above the 20% mark unless the service is really just awful. I particularly hate company people when you know they're not out any of their pocket but they still leave you only 10-12% or complain that the 16% gratuity is too high.
ReplyDeleteDH and I have been known to sit down at a table and see that someone either stiffed or was really stingy with their tipping and we make up for it with ours. We both were wait staff.
Yeah, I leave 20%. Basically staff has to call me a liar or spit in my face for me to leave less. If they did either of those things, then apologized, I would still probably leave 20%. It just seems like one of those basic human decency things.
ReplyDeleteI have a certain brother that we completely stopped going out to eat with after a delightful experience. We went took my brother and his family to our favorite sushi restaurant that hubby and I frequented OFTEN. The restaurant staff gave us free appetizers and brought us an extra sake during the meal. They were busy, but added special touches, including making origami animals for my nieces.
ReplyDeleteMy brother decided he would not tip on the food his family of FOUR consumed (about $75 worth of food) because the waitress did not bring his drink fast enough. Of course, hubby and I kicked down the 20% tip on the whole bill.
I waited tables, while putting myself through undergrad and one round of graduate school. My brother is in the military and justifies his behavior because no one tips him for doing his job.
Here is a tip, Dear Brother, pay your fair share or don't eat out. You have that choice.
Sorry this comment so long, but tipping is a subject I have strong feelings about.
Any length comment is always welcome. :) And I'm glad that other people are passionate about this, too.
ReplyDeleteIncidentally, your brother's comment that people don't tip him to do his job just shows how little understanding people have about workers in restaurants. They don't really get paid to do their jobs; that's why you tip them - to thank them for serving you for less than minimum wage.
My ex was a cheap bastard and bad tipper (and a MILLIONAIRE, I might add). I was employed part-time when I was with him, and I would always have to make up the extra to make sure the server got a nice tip. I have worked in all facets of food service over the years, so I know hat tips mean to those people. And maybe people need to be reminded that in most restaurants, the wait staff is expected/required to "tip out" her/his "support staff" meaning that not all the tips go in her pockets, but also into the pockets of the bus people (at a minimum) and sometimes even dishwashers and prep cooks.
ReplyDeleteI almost always tip 20% (sometimes even rounded up a bit) on the grand total.
ReplyDeleteI think that's very kind. What I like about this post is how much I admire my friends for their decency and generosity toward others.
ReplyDeleteJessica, I forgot to say that you make a really good point on how tips are shared out. It's not just the server a person stiffs by leaving a bad tip; it's a slew of other people who work their asses off, too
ReplyDelete