Back to the Point...

I’ve been spending so much time on the “Other Rants” portion of the Campaign for Unshaved Snatch & Other Rants that I have not written about my favorite pet peeve in quite some time. So I am happy to tie in my vacation to unshaved snatch by noting that I spent some quality time reading my favorite feminist mag Bitch on my flight back from Rome. In an interview with Carly Milne, who recently edited a book about porn called Naked Ambition (women porn stars wrote essays about their experiences in the porn industry; how cool is that?), Michelle Humphry asked a question about pubic hair and whether it was more fetishized today than in the '70s. Milne responded:

Everybody blames porn for the trend of groomed pubic hair, but I seem to recall it being called “the Brazilian wax” for a reason, you know? Otherwise it would have been called “the porno wax.” I remember reading about the Brazilian wax, not because it was discussed by Jenna Jameson, but because it was discussed by Gwyneth Paltrow in the pages of InStyle… grooming habits have changed everywhere. I don’t know a lot of people who shave every hair off their body [sic], guys included. I think that’s a sign of the times more so than [the influence of] porn.

The whole interview is pretty amusing, especially the part where Milne calls today’s trend for female stars to be “Titsicles” (“lollipop-stick girls with giant heads and giant boobs”). Man, that cracks me up because it so accurately describes not only porn stars, but women in general these days. Check it out in the latest issue of Bitch.

Anyway, Milne’s comments were interesting and made me wonder how the hell the Brazilian really spread (hee hee) to the US. Personally, I think it has a lot to do with thongs and g-strings, which if you have been reading this blog for a while, you will know that I loathe as much as I loathe unshaved snatch. It is pretty much impossible to wear a thong or g-string and not wax your beaver. Otherwise, you look ridiculous with hair hanging out everywhere, and if your pants are so tight that they require a thong/g-string so that people supposedly do not know that you actually wear underwear, I guess your snatch patch would be obvious unless you rip out what hangs out of the teeny cooch pouch. Plus, you have a string up your ass, which is as uncomfortable as it sounds. (Trust me - I did an experiment back in December. Even the distraction of a shiny rhinestone B on the soft red stretchy material of the thong could not distract me enough to make me forget that I had something wedged in my unshaved ass all day. Don't get me started on the horror show that was a g-string. Results were written up at Underwear Recap.) Why, ladies, why do you hate just being adult women so much? I don't know, but it is definitely why I hate people.

On the other hand, Suebob is a perfect example of the delight I can take in others. Her fabulous post red stapler: Crotch waxing? ¡Que barbaridad! so nicely captures my thoughts on the subject that I am extremely jealous that I did not write it myself. (Yes, there’s a little lovefest going on here.) Rock on Suebob and all women who resist the urge to hurt themselves so that they can look like a 10 year old girl for so that our pervy culture deems them sexy. Here’s to the ladies who spend their time doing more productive things (or at least less painful ones)!