Is the Mile High Club Even Possible? - An Investigative Report

I spent some time re-reading my old posts on BlogHer, back when I was the contributing editor for travel, and I thought this post from May 2006 was hilarious:

I spent the past week visiting Florence and Rome with two friends (which explains my absence from BlogHer). We had a great time, but as I endured the 9 hour return flight from Rome, I began wondering: Who are all those freaks writing letters to Penthouse Forum boasting of hot encounters with other passengers on airplanes? Unless these letter writers are some sort of contortionists without senses of smell or fear, my experience with flying leads me to doubt whether any regular traveler really belongs to the mile high club.
Click Here

Anyone who flies economy class knows that the seats are ridiculously close together, so it would be very hard to get it on with someone and not involve the people around you. (That would then be a mile high club threesome or orgy, which I suppose some people would not mind). You could try and get away with your partner and slip into the plane bathroom for some action, but the bathrooms on commercial aircraft are barely big enough for one person, even in business class. I am not very large, and when I am in the bathroom I find that there is barely enough room for me alone. Even if they squeezed in, people would find that there's not very much room to maneuver around for boot-knocking to happen. I suppose two standard size adults could do it if one sat down on the toilet and the other person on his lap. Somehow letters to Penthouse Forum about chance encounters on airplanes never seem to mention sitting on the porcelain throne as part of the action.

At any rate, even if you can fit into an airplane bathroom with someone else, I noticed that they tend to reek. Not exactly like a sewer, but a different type of gross fecund smell; a bit milder. I try to breathe as little as I can while I use the facilities of an airplane and get out as quickly as possible before I pass out. This may then be perfect for someone who engages in autoerotic asphyxiation (i.e. - denies himself oxygen to heighten his orgasm), but does masturbating in the bathroom of a plane allow you to count yourself as a member of the mile high club? I think not.

A final problem with sex in airplane bathrooms, whether alone or with another person, is the other passengers. While some people could not care less what other people think when they see two adults going into a lavatory together, I noticed that lines for the toilets can get pretty long when someone takes his sweet time to do his business. The people waiting start to get very cranky. (Or maybe it's just me - I've come damn close to trying to kick the door in and find out what the hell was taking so long in there.) The flight attendants become annoyed by the hordes of people blocking the aisles as they wait to relieve themselves. Violence could easily break out if it was known that people were in there having sex. Even if the trysters are not discouraged by the thought of an angry mob, there's the risk of injury during turbulence. It just sounds dangerous.

Unless the prospects of physical cramping, stench, and potential violence turn you on, I just don't see how anyone could find these good conditions which lead to great sex. Am I misunderstanding the situation?

What's even funnier is that one guy actually left a comment about getting it on in an airplane bathroom. All I can think is, ew...