Who would have thought another situation which requires the input of CUSS readers would present itself so quickly? Yet here I am with an important dilemma that requires the thoughtful recommendations of what is clearly the most intelligent readership in the blogosphere.
“Are these your girlfriend's?” I asked, knowing full well that they were not or I wouldn’t have asked.
“Then how’d they get in your drawer?”
“I was thinking that they may have been left in a washer or drier that we used, we didn’t notice them, and they got lumped in with our stuff.” It is definitely one of the risks of using a building-wide laundry room. In the past, we have definitely wound up with socks that don’t belong to us.
He thought about it. “No, I think they are yours.”
So, dear readers, what would you do? Throw them out? Wear them, thinking even if they are not yours, at least they are clean? The fate of my butt and crotch is in your hands….
When I go to thrift stores, I have a rule: never buy used underwear (bras included, of course). No matter how many times it's washed, used underwear will always, in my mind, conjure up images of crotch contact, and who knows what kind of crotch came before mine? (The bra rule is in place because used bras usually mean little to no support and who wants that? Certainly not me.) Said underwear could also have had menstrual blood stains scrubbed out, cum stains scrubbed out, and all other kinds of stains...even shit stains. You just never know what kind of underwear you're getting yourself into, let alone how well its previous owner maintained it (unless it's obvious). So, I'd say nay. You have plenty of underwear already--right?
ReplyDeleteIf you like them, wear them. It'll be good for your immune system...says Working Girl the woman.
ReplyDeleteWorking Girl the nurse says...toss 'em.
Ewwww, gross.
ReplyDeleteToss them for sure. Unless The Husband can give you accurate time and date stamps of when you last wore them for him. Maybe him saying he thinks they are yours was his way of saying he'd like to see you in something like that more often? Go buy a cutesy little pair from Vicky's and toss the unknowns.
I came across your blog this weekend and I want to join the Campaign, so please count me in!
ReplyDeleteAnd I would toss them, just the thought of them possibly being someone else's would make it impossible for me to wear them.
First of all, I am sick of my comments not going through because I miss commenting.
ReplyDeleteSecond of all, you always make me laugh, only you would encounter this.
Are the undies maybe from the duct tape Suzanne fashion extravaganza? Perhaps they were not returned. If you do not remember them, they may not be yours. If you must wear them, bleach them first. Sometimes if I am at my parents and need to unexpectantly shower, I get undies from my mom. It feels strange to wear them but I still do.
My first thought was with duct tape Suzanne, too. But if you're not sure they're yours, I'd ditch them.
ReplyDeleteBleach, hot water, a long tumble in the dryer and they are as good as disinfected. However, I don't buy underclothes at the thrift store so I'd be a hypocrite for telling you to wear them.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I'd probably toss them unless you suddenly remember hitting VS and buying them.
ReplyDeleteplease toss them
ReplyDeletedad
if you want a VS pair , i will donate the cash
ReplyDeletedad
Thanks for the offer, Dad. I am going to throw them out, although I decided this afternoon that I do think they are mine after all. Still, they are goners. And I hate VS underwear, so it's no real loss, anyway.
ReplyDeleteI just want to put in my 2 cents: I don't buy thrift store underwear either. AND they must be yours if they are the right size because that would be a crazy coincidence if they weren't. And? toss em. If you don't remember them, you won't miss them.
ReplyDeleteI say your dad is a helluva guy. Nevertheless, I don't think you should throw them away. Why not try selling them with other CUSS swag? Just call them "random undies that might have been mine." Or at least take a photo so your followers can see what they look like? One more idea: maybe Husband needs a new thong? Not exactly sure how that last one would work.
ReplyDeleteSuz, they are mine! They must have gotten mixed up with your stuff in Memphis! Bubbe would say toss them;
ReplyDeleteno random discharge allowed from strange underwear (or beds, for that matter)!
Even as a committed lesbian with no discernable boundaries and with a girlfriend with which I have intimite crotch-related congress, I'd have to say that strange woman crotches are blechy...unless I hope to have congress with them, which would, of course, get me the ass-whupping of a lifetime.
ReplyDeletePitch the panties. It's just safer that way.
i didn't think any reputable thrift store sells used undies. i know ours around here only take them with the tag on & even then, they're picky.
ReplyDeleteall that said, i'd pitch them. but they seem to be your mumsy's so best send them back illoise. :)
My mom was kidding. She definitely does not wear any low rise undies. Her preference is for undergarments that are about the same size and fit as jogging shorts. Seriously.
ReplyDeletemy mum too. the best part was that my grandma would still buy her 3-packs of giant silky panties in pastel shades.
ReplyDeleteDid you lick them? Did they taste like Ricola? If so, their yours. Please share for your readers the story of licking your undies on camera in the basement of the Central Park West laundry room.
ReplyDeleteBig B
Shit, I meant "they're". I hate proofreading errors.
ReplyDeleteBig B
and yes, if you really don't know, throw them out.
ReplyDeletewhile you are at it, please share the story of the midwest roadtrip and little sister's undies...
ReplyDelete