Hanukkah begins tonight at sundown. Over the last few years, Husband and I have become less and less interested in Hanukkah. We managed to get each other one small gift this year. I hope he will like the $10 glass Mets mug that I picked up last week. I have no idea what he is giving me. I'm sure it will be far more clever than a $10 glass Mets mug.
Husband and I may not be taking the religiously insignificant holiday of Hanukkah seriously enough for the likes of the Holiday Sales Industry. Cartier, Macy's, Lord & Taylor, Bloomingdale's, Saks Fifth Avenue, and Barney's all have ads on pages 2,3, and 5 of today's New York Times wishing me a Happy Chanukah. They all spelled it "Chanukah," too, which makes me wonder if the Times issued some sort of guidelines for luxury good purveyors who wanted to sell me shit. Macy's, Lord & Taylor, and Bloomingdale's went an extra step and wrote little Chanukah poems and greetings. The sentiments bring a fucking tear to my eye, I tell you. Tiffany's has an ad, but it doesn't wish me anything. Instead, it reads, "'Tis the Tiffany Season," and depicts a "dreidel in sterling silver, 3" high, $200."
After seeing all the ads, I realized that I never again need bother look up when a gift-giving holiday officially begins. (Last night Husband and I debated whether Hanukkah kicked off tonight or tomorrow night, and I googled it.) From now on, I'll just look at the ads in the paper and go from there. None of the department stores or jewelers would let me forget an important religious occasion, would they? How thoughtful of them.
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I was going to buy you the dreidel from Tiffany's, but then I remembered that I don't celebrate Chanukah or Hanukkah.
ReplyDeleteMore important than Hanukkah - its almost your birthday!
ReplyDelete"The sentiments bring a fucking tear to my eye, I tell you"
ReplyDeleteblaaahaaahha! Me too. If I hear one more time that cashmere is the reason for the season, I'm gonna throw up a little in my mouth.
may i ask what the difference is between hanukkah & chanukah? i always liked the 'h' one myself.
ReplyDeletei'm quite sickened by the commercialism of the season.
also, regarding your subject, my bf said something about the labia majora yesterday & i said 'opposed to the labia minora?' but it sounded an awful lot like menorah. not to blaspheme or anything. :)
Mar... which reminds me of the lyrics to a Peaches song. Something about her "labia majora dancing the hora."
ReplyDeleteSo much for the little dreidel made out of clay, huh?
ReplyDeleteBut as Adam Sandler would say "Drink some gin and tonica, it's time to celebrate Hanukah!" (I celebrate all year long.)
Do you think that it is odd that at age 43 (I'll be 44 tomorrow), that I still know all of the words to two or three Hanukah songs that I learned in elementary school?
ReplyDeleteDid I mention that I'm Lutheran?