After my dad picked me up from the airport this morning, we ran an errand and then headed to my bubby's swank apartment in senior citizen housing. It is on the 12th floor and overlooks Lake Michigan. If it were a condo, it would undoubtedly cost several hundred thousand buckeroos. Instead, it is highly subsidized by us taxpayers. I think she pays about $400 a month for a decent-size one bedroom with a million dollar view. I'm only slightly jealous.
For the first 30 minutes we were there, she stuffed our faces and talked to us. Then her pals arrived and she held court at her dining table in Russian. I speak better Hindi than I do Russian (reminder: I know about 14 Hindi words), so needless to say, I felt neglected, although also relieved. As long as she was being rude, I figured it would be OK to be rude right back and read my book. ("Nature Girl" by Carl Hiaason. I love Hiaason, but this was definitely not among his best work. It did nicely pass the time, however.) Damn, I am a surly little bitch.
Later, I had dinner with my parents and Rachel and her partner and kid. Their kid is so fucking adorable. Especially with ice cream all over her face. (Hey, I don't have to wash her clothes later, so it is easy to laugh. Her folks are good peeps and didn't seem to perterbed either.) Rachel told us an amusing story about chaperoning the prom last spring. The principal's wife was relating a disaster that unfolded at her sister's wedding on a hot day. It seems that the icing on the cake melted, and the sister freaked out. The prinicpal's wife (doesn't that sound like a character in Canterbury Tales?) told her sister to calm down because the day was not about icing. It was about dick. Dick as in "Dick, the man her sister was marrying," but as she repeated the line over and over again, all the teachers sitting at the table turned red from the effort to not laugh outloud. Rachel even had to kick someone under the table to stop him from giggling.
Maybe my bubby tells hilarious stories like this when she sits around and guffaws with her friends in Russian.
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ha ha ha. Dick. That is what a wedding is all about. But you can also have Dick and icing.
ReplyDeleteOk, I need to stop right now.
Hilarious. Last ngiht we were discussing badmitton at my MIL's house when I looked her dead in the eye and said "I had to go buy more cocks, cause the one I used was all torn up." THANK GOD my husband expanded that to shuttlecock.
ReplyDeleteI'm just jealous that you have a grandmother you get to call bubby. When I was young I always thought that sounded so cool. Is that weird?
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