One of today's specials listed on the wipe board outside the diner near my gym is goulash over noodles. I just like how that sounds. It sort of describes the customer service I received at the post office last week.
"I'd like to buy insurance for this letter," I told the postal clerk when I stepped up to the window. I tried very hard not to be distracted by the lipstick smeared all over her face, but it was difficult.
"You can't buy insurance for a letter," she intoned.* The lipstick smear moved up and down, hypnotizing me.
"What? But I want to insure this," I was confused.
"We don't insure any letters," the lipstick smear was upside down now, frowning at my stupidity. "What's in the envelope?"
"A gift card," I replied.
"Who buys gift cards these days? Doesn't everyone know what a scam they are?" she ranted while selling me a certified delivery service. "You just lose money on them, whether they expire or they charge you monthly rates for not using it. Gift cards are a big scam!"
"Um, whatever." My eyes darted to either side of me. Could this be one of those postal workers who goes, well, postal? "Thanks for your help."
"No problem. Want anything else? Stamps?" the lipstick smiled.
Yeah, how about some sanity? I thought. Fortunately, Crazy McCrazyson sent the letter along, and Des received her birthday present. From now on, I order gift cards online and have the companies send them directly, the way God intended.
*FYI - According to the USPS website, you cannot insure a letter sent via Standard Mail. However, I would've upgraded to priority mail happily so I could get insurance had the option been offered to me.
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Did the lipstick move of its own accord?
ReplyDeleteI think it did. Scary.
ReplyDeleteThere is something about the post office. With all apologies to any sane postal workers out there, the post office in the town I grew up in has horrible customer service and the post office in the town I moved to has horrible customer service.
ReplyDeletemerl,
ReplyDeleteThere are no sane postal employees, nor has there ever been any.
Suzanne,
Ms Lipstick should have sold you a register mail service. All register mail are automatically insured up to a certain amount, I forgot what. By the way, the Hope Diamond was mailed by registered mail because of the high security that is part of the deal with rm.
You're a bad friend to waste your money on a gift card rather than try and pick out a book I'll like, package it, and pay for it to be shipped. How dare you.
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