While the “average” woman annoys the crap out of me (as does the “average” man – it is all a part of my general hatred of people), we have a few things in common. In the past I mentioned my inappropriate obsession with whether I look fat or not, which bothers me because I know that this doesn’t matter at all and my weight has never stopped me from doing anything I wanted to. (When I was significantly overweight, I: earned a scholarship and attended college, began dating Husband, graduated magna cum laude, was offered a scholarship to attend Fordham Law School, and had several job offers.) The only thing that is fat is the waste of time thinking about it.
The other thing I fret about that the “average” woman (meaning: someone who actually reads Cosmo and other magazines for advice on life) also generates frown lines over is whether I look old. Scratch that – I don’t even want to look my actual age, which is not remotely old at all. I was spoiled by my excessively youthful appearance back in the day when I really was youthful, and it is weird to me to not be considered that way any more. Not that I do anything to prevent the aging process. I only use moisturizer when my skin is so dry that my face is literally cracking off. My hatred of beauty industry products far exceeds my desire to not look 40 when I am actually 40, although not my interest in not terrifying people with a detaching face.
This is the complicated part. While I was delighted yesterday when the salesguy at Bloomingdale’s called me “young lady” (as in, “Would you like to try those dresses on, young lady?” which makes me wonder what young lady has $400+ to blow on a fucking dress. Yeesh.), I also want to look my age once I’ve earned some wisdom. The dilemma, then, is not to wrinkle up before I hit official sagedom. In the meantime, it is OK with me if people think that I am somewhere between the ages of 14-16. (At work, I always enjoyed surprising people at meetings when I could see that they were thinking, “Who the fuck is this kid?” and then I’d say something particularly knowledgeable or insightful. The looks on their faces was priceless.)
The life stages between “guru” and “idiot youth” are tough ones in so many ways, no?
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people have a tendency to thinki am about 23 for some reason. i blame the acne and hot pink sneakers non-uptight attitude.
ReplyDeletehowever i do stress about my weight and i love girly shopping and shit like that.
Adults annoy me, but children and teenagers annoy me too. As do some of the more cunning apes. So if you're going to be confused for something, know that youre genre will probably annoy me. But you as a person do not annoy me.
ReplyDeleteI think your small stature probably has something to do with why people think you are so young.
ReplyDeleteMy life stage is "pre-cranky."
Hee, hee! Even thought I am amazonian, the girl who cut my hair thought I was 22 a few weeks ago and the girl that I work with who is actually 22 routinely expresses disbelief at my age. She says that I'm going to look 29 when I'm 40. My mom would say that I look young because my face is fat:)
ReplyDeleteThe zits probably don't hurt either. I guess they are still more noticeable than the gray hair.
ReplyDeleteI find that it depends on who I'm around. If I have my kids with me, people tend to think I'm older. If they're not with me, they think I'm younger. I had to prove I was 18 to buy spray adhesive the other day although I doubt that the salesclerk really thought I was under 18. It was a store policy. I'm most happy when people think I'm the age I really am. Honestly, that's what I get most of the time. I hate this whole let's pretend I'm older (if you're a teenager) or younger (if you're an adult.) Why is it wrong to just want to look your age?
ReplyDeleteI'm all for using facial moisturizer, though. I hate having itchy dry skin and with all the skin cancer in my family I'm a big fan of a daily use of the lotion with SPF.