"Would you like some gravy on that?"

When I was a little girl, my grandmother called vaginas butter biscuits, as in, “Be sure to wipe your butter biscuit after you go to the bathroom.” This caused severe embarrassment later in life when people would talk about eating biscuits. I had assumed that all people called girls’ crotches biscuits, and I could not understand why no one else was embarrassed to order them in restaurants. (I was recently at an abortion rights conference in Atlanta, and a bunch of us went to a local restaurant called The Flying Biscuit. My friend Steph loves biscuits - the baked pastry, not vaginas - and so I told her about how much I loved The Flying Biscuit. We decided that The Flying Biscuit would be great name for a lesbian bar if only other people used the same slang.) To this day, it still freaks me out a little to eat biscuits, although I do enjoy them very much with butter and strawberry jam.