Wednesday, March 1, 2006

More Sites About Unshaved Snatch

In my effort to understand other sites that are about unshaved snatch, I previously investigated biggest unshaved pussy in the world, a real term that someone used that led them to this very blog. What I found was disturbingly funny, so I will continue my public interest work and search “hairiest vulva,” another search term used by someone. Entering “hairiest vulva” into google yielded the following treasures:

“Hairiest vulva” led to four total hits. The Campaign for Unshaved Snatch & Other Rants was #2. (Go CUSS!) The others were annoying lists of lists of sites. Sadly, this was not nearly as fun as biggest unshaved pussy in the world, which sort of makes sense in a fucked up way.

Unshaved women was a term that led more than one person to CUSS (or one person who forgot that the link to CUSS didn’t yield any actual unshaved snatch), so I tried that next. “Bingo!” I thought. All the Pits was hit #3. “All the Pits, All the Time” is their motto. However, I was disappointed to find just some pictures of women with hairy armpits on the beach with no text to mock. What a bust!

Hit #5, Danger Dave - Hairy Pussy, brings us back to our friends ATK Natural and Hairy (“The Internet’s No.1 Hairy Pussy Site”) and a new option, Super Bush. Super Bush is wrong on so many levels. Although they boast of “mounds of delicious unshaven pubes + pits!,” the devil is always in the details (in this case, the fine print):

100% natural and unshaven, just the way nature intended. No shaved snatches here! Just pure, natural coochie with a smell that let’s you know it’s ripe for the fucking!

Cough, choke, gasp, wheeze. No, it could not possibly say something so foul, could it? In my hysterical laughing fit caused by horror (and the fact that it is after 1:00 AM and I am tired), I accidentally clicked on the offensive statement. It only got worse:

What could be more beautiful than a hot chick with a killer body? Knowing that she has a stunning overgrown patch of pungent pubes down south… let’s be honest – the whole shaved thing is overdone, and overrated. What’s more rare, and more sexy, is a foxy feline with a ferocious fetch of flatteringly fragrant fuck fur!

Seriously, it says that, which causes me to come to a few conclusions.
1. Porn sites need to stay far away from alliteration.
2. Unshaved women are probably not as rare as hairy porn sites claim.
3. This Bush site (like its presidential namesake) should wash its head out with douche. What is this fucked up concept that unshaved snatch smells?!?! Damn!

Bah! Further research was stymied when I got a message from my anti-virus software that a file that I was downloading (and not with my approval, trust me) had a virus called Trojan something or other. However, I feel confident that I reviewed enough material to provide meaningful guidance on at least one other site about unshaved snatch. I was amused and educated as to the quality (or lack thereof) that is out there, and I hope you feel the same way.

4 comments:

  1. People seeking pictures of unshaved snatches on your blog reminds me of a co-worker once who said she was going to check out a movie for her children to watch and she was considering “Silence of the Lamb” .
    Eddie

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  2. Dear cuss,
    Would you please give a sista with unshaved snatch and pits a link in your sidebar? :)

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  3. Fuck fur?!? That is absolutely brilliant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  4. OK, I found it disturbingly hilarious also.

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