Sunday, April 20, 2008
Springtime is For Shearing Sheep and Women
I posted an essay about shaving my legs and arm pits over at BlogHer today. It's one of the best essays I think I've written in a while. (It's weird how the MFA application process sapped my writing inspiration and abilities for a few months.) Synopsis: When I was young and idealistic, I didn't shave my legs or arm pits as a political statement and way to rebel again patriarchal beauty standards. Now that I am old and cynical, I don't shave my legs or arm pits because I am lazy, but this makes me embarrassed in public, so now I am stuck with the razor during the revealing months of spring and summer. Good times.
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I shaved my legs last night for the first time since last August. I don't bother to shave in winter, and that is both political and lazy related. I shave my legs in summer for one reason only - I LOVE the way my smooth legs feel when I use my favorite, hugely expensive, coconut-scented "summer" lotion on them, and I love how brown and shiny they are. This is a summer ritual only, and I do this for no one but myself.
ReplyDeleteMy pits, well, are another issue. I stopped shaving them on the regular a few years back when the butthole I was seeing made a crack about the stubble, and how gross it was. His sexist yapper earned him a free pass to Hairy Pit Central for the remainder of our relationship.
But, I have to admit, I usually cave and shave in summer because I just can't stand the looks I get. It pisses me off and ruins my day and in the end it's not worth it to me. However, this year I am living close to a silly, vacuous, obnoxious, vain girl, and I may flaunt my hairy pits just to make her nuts. Because I live to annoy idiots.
I love you, Jessica.
ReplyDeleteI love you, too!
ReplyDeleteI bought some interesting yogurt - could I do a review?
Yes, absolutely! Email me and I'll set you up as a contributer to the yogurt blog. (I can't find where I have your email.)
ReplyDeleteHa! Ha! I just had brunch with a friend that I hadn't seen in almost a year. As we were alone in a parking lot getting into our cars, she stopped me to show me how hairy her legs were. I guess she knew from our college days that I can seriously appreciate some serious laziness on the whole hair-removal process. I think she thought I would be impressed but I proceeded to pull up my pants leg and show her that mine were just as hairy. I guess what I am impressed about is that she has a boyfriend (had, actually, she dumped his ass after brunch) AND hairy legs. I think if I had a boyfriend, I would actually shave but I would probably get pretty damn tired of it pretty quickly. Actually, that's probably true for both scenarios - shaving and having a boyfriend:)
ReplyDelete-Steph
I shave my legs and armpits the year round. It isn't any trouble at all to do a quick touch up in the shower. I prefer my legs smooth and my pits hairless. However, it should be a matter of preferences for what WE like, not what some man or society wants.
ReplyDeleteJessica, you are a cross between my beloved Suzanne and myself. I don't shave in winter either because I celebrate my mammalian characteristics. After all, why are mammals covered with hair? For warmth, of course!
ReplyDeleteI'm just a chip off the old block! Thankfully, you are a very good block, mom.
ReplyDeletePlease accept a comment from a man who loves furry women. Wherever you care to grow it. It's not for warmth and hasn't been for awhile- it's there to hold the pheromones. Women have natural and very provocative scents, and shaved women lose that attraction. Please, ladies, put the razors down.
ReplyDeletePS- don't ask me how I ran into this blog- I haven't a clue.