How 'bout a Pelvic Exam with that Brazilian?

My friend went to the gynecologist recently and was horrified to discover that they began offering “salon services” such as chemical peels, laser hair removal, and acne treatment. The gyne explained that the practice could no longer meet overhead costs because insurance reimbursements were so low and liability insurance premiums were so high. (For a CUSS solution to this complex policy problem, see Suzanne's Simple Solutions to Complex Policy Problems.) My friend was slightly mollified, but still disgusted that women’s health care providers would resort to practices that aren’t exactly good for women’s health. (Yeah, shocking, I know.)

I think that there’s some good synergy going on in offering Brazilian and bikini hair removal at the gynecologist’s office. Sadly, it seems that more women routinely spread it for the removal of their pubes than for a pap smear. Is it really worse to have a laser shot into the ol’ cooch and ass than it is to have a speculum inserted? Offering pap smears with Brazilians would actually be brilliant. The laser wielder already has a good view of the cervix. Just get her to quickly stick a swab up there and presto! – good health care happens! Another interesting benefit of a bikini plucking in a gyne’s office is immediate treatment if something unpleasant is revealed during the waxing. Did the laserist notice crabs? Were genital warts exposed after the pubes were burned off? Again, presto! - health care happens! Amazing, isn’t it?

And hey, what’s another $100 for the lab results when you are already dropping $300 for a Brazilian, right? (That’s the astronomical sum it will cost for one Brazilian laser procedure in my friend’s gyne’s office. Don’t even get me started about how some women are willing to pay that much for crotch hair removal but not basic health care.) Or maybe you can do a buy-a-hair-removal, get-a-pelvic-exam-for-free type of deal. Very symbiotic, I tell ya.