More on the Pubic Alert

As I finally drifted into a fitful slumber around 4 am (damn damn insomnia), I was still traumatized by the crotch pictures of young Brtiney Spears. (And also I forgot to hat tip the always delightful SJ of I, Asshole, which is where I first heard about the pictures.) Maybe 5 or 6 months ago, Lindsey Lohan had an incident where she was wearing a thong to the Kids' Choice Awards and her skirt was tangled in it or something and she flashed her ass to the audience of young impressionable minds. At the time, I wrote that this was one of those reminders that thongs are useless as underwear.

Back to Britney, as Suebob noted, who goes out in public with teeny skirts and no undies? At first I thought that maybe if she had been wearing her usual g-string, she could have avoided the worst of the situation. Then it occurred to me that the resultant photos could have been even more disturbing, with the string wedged into her pube-free cootch. That would have made some serious fetish photos. Suebob is also right that those gynerazzi are creepy to takes such pictures, and it is scary to think that this could happen to any one of us if we were famous and walked around with no underwear and what is essentially a long t-shirt.

Ultimately, the whole thing reminds me of my whole "Mother Nature" pubic hair theory of life: Think of pubic hairs as an organic warning system of sorts. It’s your guardian angel Mother Nature preventing you from humiliation by telling you to put some clothes on because you look obscene. I'm sure that Britney would not have gone out with no undies and a miniscule bottom if she had crotch hair hanging out all over the place. It would be protection from her own bad judgment and the vile photographers that took advantage of it.