Check Him Out! (At the V&A, Part I)

Saturday, Husband and I checked into our fancy hotel.  (I love when he travels for business.)  We then ran off to meet Husband’s friend for lunch and to take in the Victoria and Albert (V&A) Museum.  For those of you unfamiliar with the V&A, it is a fabulous museum filled with completely random crap.  Not crap in the sense that it is like a museum that I would curate in my apartment, but crap in the sense that it is stuffed to the gills with strange odds and ends.  I saw three things of particular note to CUSS, two of which I took pictures of and will each be posted separately.

Item 1 for discussion is the reproduction of Michelangelo’s David.  This fine statue was copied in plaster and in a large room of other famous sculptures, statues, and architectural pieces that were also reproduced in plaster.  All were done in Victorian times.  In general, I found this completely hysterical, but in some sense, I suppose it made sense, as your average Brit was not going to travel to all of these places in 1875 to see the originals, so this brought the work to the people.  Sort of clever, really.  It was just a bit odd having everything in the same two rooms with no rhyme or reason on display.

Anyway, back to David.  As I walked past David, I could not help but observe that he had an extremely large tuft of pubic hair carved above his dick.  (I also thought it looked like he was circumcised, but I thought that didn’t really make sense for Renaissance times to have a circumcised statue – despite the character’s Jewish faith – as non-Jews did not get circumcised back then, and it is not like sculptors based their work on historically accuracy.  I mean, Michelangelo also carved Moses with horns, which was also reproduced in plaster and on display at the V&A.)  It occurred to me that I had never seen pubes on a statue before, especially not on female nude statues.  

How annoying is that?  To begin with, there are very few nude male statues.  Then, to add insult to injury, the one famous nude male statue fucking gets to have pubic hair, just like a normal human male.  Female statues get their marble pubic hair shaved off by the chisel.  Even in art, grown ladies can’t win.  This tempts me to get a permanent marker and scribble pubes on any naked lady statues I see.  That would be great fun and hilarious.  Who’s with me?